Watching that assassin take out Tony Montana at the end of Scarface and Arnie tearing up the streets of LA in The Terminator got me thinking….who are the greatest badasses in film history? The urban dictionary definition states that a badass is someone who is “Awesome to an extreme level, thereby leveraging unquestionable authority.” Well, here’s the first instalment of some of the baddest MF’s in film history…
#1 William Munny( Clint Eastwood, Unforgiven)
Badasses don’t need good strategy. William Munny’s plan for exacting revenge on local sheriff Little Bill? Saunter into a saloon full of heavily armed hostile men with a shotgun and a revolver and kill everything that moves. Then, simply escape from the town by looking so menacingly at all the armed men waiting outside, that none of them dare shoot. That’s what we’re talking about here. In all seriousness though, great, great film.
“All right, I’m coming out. Any man I see out there, I’m gonna shoot him. Any sumbitch takes a shot at me, I’m not only gonna kill him, but I’m gonna kill his wife, all his friends, and burn his damn house down.”
“It’s a hell of a thing, killin’ a man. Take away all he’s got, and all he’s ever gonna have. “
#2 Dae-su Oh (Min-sik Choi, Oldboy)
After spending 15 years imprisoned in solitary confinement (some of which he spent learning to fight against a concrete wall) Dae-su Oh escapes and is hellbent on revenge. Whilst trying to track down his tormentor he eats an entire live octopus and, armed with a hammer and his fists, takes out 25 thugs in a hallway. Look at the picture and ask yourself, would you mess?
“Erasing my memory and telling me to find the truth was cowardly. I won. So die like you promised.”
“If by any chance Mido should find out the truth… I’m going to rip you limb from limb. And your remains will never be found. Why? Because I’m going to swallow every last bit.”
#3 The Skull (Geno Silva, Scarface)
It doesn’t get much more badass than assassinating Tony Montana, this guy was the inspiration behind this post. Hitmen and assassins have almost unlimited badass potential, especially when they’re called ‘The Skull’. As well as shooting Montana in the back with a shotgun, he also deals with an FBI informant by taking him up in a helicopter and hanging him from it. That’s big boy sh*t.
#4 Jules (Samuel L Jackson, Pulp Fiction)
The ultimate badass, this guy is what it’s all about. Effortlessly cool and probably the most quotable badass of all time. As well as quoting a passage of the bible to people before shooting them, he also talks two armed robbers out of an ongoing hold-up and administers several verbal beatings. Credit where it’s due. Never insult this man’s mother.
“Don’t be tellin’ me about foot massages. I’m the foot f*ckin’ master. “
“I want you to go in that bag, and find my wallet….it’s the one that says Bad Motherf*cker”
#5 Jason Bourne (Matt Damon, The Bourne Series)
I almost didn’t want to include Bourne in this list, for me he lacks a bit of cool, but when you look at the facts there’s no doubting his badass credentials. He has a swiss bank account full of passports, kills a foe armed with only a magazine (and then uses said magazine to blow up a house), disinfects a gunshot wound with vodka before using it to blind a policemen so he can annihilate his partner with some kung-fu and stabs a guy with a pen. Fair enough Jason, you’re in.
“I can tell you the license plate numbers of all six cars outside. I can tell you that our waitress is left-handed and the guy sitting up at the counter weighs two hundred fifteen pounds and knows how to handle himself. I know the best place to look for a gun is the cab or the gray truck outside, and at this altitude, I can run flat out for a half mile before my hands start shaking….”
I’d love to see those stuck in a room together.